And then there were two...

Sleeps that is!  Holy hell!  This week has literally blown by.  And it definitely has blown in more way than one yup, that's what she said!  I haven't exercised since Saturday and my last run was on Friday.  What is happening here?

I honestly was going to do my long run - the big scary 9-miler, on Saturday.  I wanted to just do it and get it out of the way.  Then Saturday happened and the run didn't.  I could pull out any number of excuses, but they're all just that, excuses.  At the end of the day, I was lazy and all I did was JM.  So then I convinced myself that I could do 6 on Sunday and 3 on Monday to make up for my laziness.  That also did not happen.  We had family over for dinner on Sunday and I spent the entire afternoon cooking in the kitchen getting meals prepped for when we're away this weekend (I know, I'm the nicest sister/mama ever!)  So, what about Monday, right?

I'll tell you about Monday.  It started off at 5:30 in the morning - which you may or may not know, doesn't happen around here unless it absolutely has to.  This had to.  You see, my biggest little boy, when he was less than 2 years old, he fell and hit his head quite hard on the coffee table.  We had him checked out by the Dr immediately because he got quite the goose egg on his forehead as a result.  The assured us it was nothing.  That goose egg, it never went away.  As a matter of fact, it continued to grow until it was about the circumference of a quarter.  I know, big right?  So, our pediatrician, sent us to Sick Kids where it was ultra sounded, poked and prodded, but still no one knew what was going on.

Finally, we were sent to see a neurologist there.  He sent us for our first MRI and CT scan - which is an entirely other post about how you can feel like the worst, most helpless parent ever when they sedate your child right in front of you and you can't hold them or talk to them and tell them it's going to be alright.  I know, I'm not scared at all from the experience!  However, what you need to know is 2 things.  First, the MRI and CT scan both returned inconclusive results and showed that the cyst had characteristics of various kinds of tumors but they couldn't be sure of what it was without removing it.  So, they removed it.  Again, another post all on it's own.

The second thing you need to know is that when they did the MRI, they found that my baby had a cyst in his brain as well.  This past MRI was number 4 for my poor little dude.  When he had the second scan two years after the first, they found that the cyst had grown; because of that growth, we now have to have the MRI done yearly.  Last year however, there had been no change.  I'm desperately hoping for the same results this year.

So, Monday started out early AND it was stressful!  However, it was quick and without sedation, we were in and out of there in less than 2 hours.  Unheard of!  So, why didn't I come home and run?  Well, 1) I was a wee bit exhausted.  2) Both of the kids were home with me for the rest of the day because I felt like they deserved some down time after the crack of dawn start to their day!  Plus, the Husband is now out of town for like the next 2 weeks so I thought it would be nice for them to spend some time with him.

The other reason why the Monday run didn't happen?  I felt like poop!  I'm trying desperately to not get the cold that my little man has had for going on 4 weeks now and yesterday it felt like I was losing the battle.  Today, I'm on the fence about who is winning.

Here's the thing.  Whenever the Husband and I plan any kind of trip away, just the two of us?  One or both of us without fail gets sick.  I do NOT want to fly for 4 hours sick again.  I don't, I don't, I DON'T!!  We are flying business class to an adult only, uber romantic resort.  I. Am. Not. Going. To. Be. Sick.

I guess this was my really long way of telling you that it's been crazy around here for the last few days. And even though I really wanted to get my runs in, I haven't.  I am definitely going to be taking my shoes and gear to Mexico, but well, I'm also going to enjoy myself and relax.  I weighed in this morning at 165.5.  So even though it's not a huge decrease, at least I'm back below 166 again.  I'm going to do my best and not overindulge too much on our trip, but I'm going to have fun!

I can't wait to lie on the beach in one of the private little beach beds they have.  I shit you not!

Specially located for privacy and attended by your Beach Butler, our beach beds allow you to share intimate moments while gentle breeze and the sound of the waves pamper you.

I mean come on!  Who can be sick when there's a BEACH BUTLER ready to be at your beck and call?  Whaaaaaaaat?  That's right!  Not this girl!

So, this is probably me signing off until after Mexico so adios amigos!  I will post pics afterwards, I promise!

Winner winner! Chicken dinner!

I feel like today is a bittersweet kind of a day.  The chicks completely ruled the dicks in this competition.  I mean completely - like I believe (and I don't actually have the exact figures yet to back this up but I will) I almost lost as much on my own (percentage wise) as the brother and husband did combined!
However, the bittersweet part?  I weighed in this morning at freaking 1671!!  What the hell?  This weekend I ran 15 miles collectively.  I did 30DS twice AND I stayed within my calorie goals all weekend even though it was holiday extraordinaire here in the great white north!  Last week, I saw that 165.  It was there.  And then it went away.  I gotta get that sucker back - and then bust through that bad boy like nobodies business!
On a positive note?  I'm pretty sure that I can be back down there before the end of the week.  I think I have two major issues that were a tiny bit out of my control this weekend.  The first?  Traveling around to different family dinners meant not being able to drink my regular water amounts.  When I don't drink my water I almost always gain a pound or two.  The second factor?  Well, that one is pretty much out of my control and goes a little something like, 'oh hello TOM!  Thanks for making me bloat and feel crappy!'  That should also correct itself by the end of the week.  Maybe, just maybe I'll have a huge 5 lb week finally!  How amazing would that be?  Soooooo amazing!
So now, where to go?  What to do on this awesome trip where the girls get to decide where we're going and what we're doing!  Boston is on the table for sure.  I've never been and would love to explore the shopping city in all it's splendor!  However, New Orleans and Mardi Gras are also on my list of places I really want to explore.  I love places that are full of history with beautiful old buildings and of course offer some great shopping options!  The catch is that they have to be relatively close to my house (no more than a 6/7 hour drive from Toronto) AND fun regardless the season/time of year.  I think I'm going to have to do some more research!

So, goal for this week?  Get my meal plan done asap so that I don't spend the week figuring out at 4:30 what's for dinner that night!  I think I'm going to troll my all-time-fav-low-cal-yummy-recipe-blog and see what I can come up with for the week.  I'm feeling like the veggies have definitely been lacking in our diet as of late so I need to do something about that for sure!

Gotta go get my sweat on!

ciao bellas!

Take that Beeeee-otch!

Ha!  Today?  Today, was a GREAT day!

First of all, yesterday was a fun-tasticly f'ing looooooong day.  We were up at 5:15 so that the husband and the big boy could be at the arena before 6:00 am for the first game of the season.  Apart from a few awkward and uncomfortable moments with some people from my past (now that's a blog post for another time) it was a really great game!  My big boy loves hockey.  He might not be the best player on the team, but he really loves being out there and to me, that's all that counts!

Came home for a bit of down time and then headed west to have pre-Thanksgiving (yup, for us Canadian folk it's only a week 'til turkey time!) with the BIL and SIL.  It was such a gorgeous day for a drive, how could it not have been perfect?  We love going to visit with BIL and SIL.  They live about 21/2 hours away from us, so we don't get to see them nearly as often as we'd like.  One of these days we'll have to do something about that, right SIL? ;)

So, with a pre-Thanksgiving dinner under my belt, literally, I was a tiny bit worried about the scale this week.  I knew after finishing my 8 miler on Saturday and behaving myself relatively well that I'd probably be ok, but, well...you just never know!  So I was pretty ecstatic when I saw 166.6 staring back at me this morning! Yup, that's 1.6 away from the goal I set back in July and only 16.6 away from my new final goal!

I actually wrote down my stats this morning (which I normally don't do because I'm too consumed with whatever is flashing back at me to concentrate on the other numbers!)  I really don't know how accurate these numbers are.  I mean, I bought the scale from Walmart, so it's not exactly the most high tech thing out there!  However, the numbers flashed as follows:

Weight - 166.6 (woooooooot)
lbs from fat - 49.2 / 29.6%
Water - 51.3%
BMI - 26.1

The lbs / % of fat is still higher than I'd like it to be, but my BMI is definitely getting closer to the 22 - 24 range that I'd like for it to be in.

So getting back to why today was a GREAT day?  Well, not only did I get my 3-miler in today, I also got my kids off to school with out WWIII, my husband was in an, ahem, fantastic mood, AND I got through level 1, day 2 of JM 30-Day Shred!  Now if I can just get through 30 more days of working out with that crazy bitch, I'll be one happy chick!

On tap for tomorrow?  3.5 miles, 30DS AND the return of haaaaaaaawwwwwwwttttttttt yoga.  Yup, yup, yup!  I cannot wait to sweat my balls off not 1, not 2 but 3 f'ing times tomorrow!  It's gonna be epic!

Go kick some butt!

Feel, feel, FEEL the frustration!

I'm a day late posting this week for weigh-in Monday - seems it's becoming a trend.  Not good.  Besides, Weigh-in Tuesday doesn't sound very good.  At. All.  Weigh-in Wednesday though, now that has a nice ring to it!

So I stepped on the scale yesterday morning and I was down, but not where I'd wanted to be.  The hope was to get to at least 170 if not 169.  I worked hard last week and even got the worst 6 mile run of  my life in!  73 f'ing minutes it took me to complete that run.  That's 1 hour and 13 minutes - to do 10 k! Craptastical, that's what that is!  I blame it on the treadmill dude for upping the torque on my treadmill last week.  I'm finding it tricky to get used to the new speed and basically have to re-work my brain to not feel like every run is taking twice as long.

I should probably also admit at this moment in time, that although my weight did still go down to 171, that I should be pretty damn happy since the evening before was dinner at the head Richard's house to celebrate his entrance into my life, aka his birthday.  I ate cake.  WOW!  That feels like a weight has suddenly lifted...oh wait!  Nope, it hasn't!  It's still on my ass!  I have a superstition though that I blame my mom for.  She always told us that it was bad luck to not eat cake on someone's birthday.  I didn't have a big piece - it was like a 30th of the cake, but man it was good and I ate every last bite.  I actually contemplated licking the icing from the plate for about a second, but thought that was a tad drastic - and probably pretty uncool!

So, what am I doing this week to make sure that my birthday weigh-in is super-fantastical-amaze-balls? Well!  First of all, I'm absolutely addicted to the Mama Laughlin Fit Camp FB group!  I'm going there for motivation on a daily basis.  Secondly, I finally downloaded a food tracking app onto my phone - Myfitnesspal.  If you are looking for one, but haven't decided what works for you, check it out!  It's the best one I've EVER downloaded, and let me tell you, I've downloaded quite a few!

Second, I'm getting all of my runs in this week and then some.  I think I'm going to take the boys on a couple of bike rides this week too just to keep everybody moving AND I'm going to go and do a hot yoga class (or two) before Thursday night when I get my hair did!

Birthday weigh-in, I'm gonna fist pump you into next week!!

Bittersweet victory

Ok, so yesterday was the dreaded physical. I mean, who doesn't dread a physical anyway, right?  But yesterday was the day I was going to step on the scale in my Dr's office and go on record for the year.  The rest of it, meh, whatevs!  It was the stepping on the scale that had me biting my nails and trying to pee even when I didn't have too!

Have you ever tried to make yourself pee when you haven't had anything to drink since about 8:00 the night before and refuse to put anything more than the tiniest drop of water in your mouth to swish out the toothpaste that you unfortunately have to use if you don't want to actually kill your Dr with your disgusting morning halitosis! It's not easy and clearly not all that effective!

Soooooo, what you're all waiting for is what the scale said, I know!  I'm trying to keep you hanging a bit.  Is it working?  Probably not since I'm pretty sure that I'm the only one who reads these rambles!  When I stepped on my scale yesterday morning, the scale said........172.4!  Not the 169 I was hoping for (hence the bittersweet part) BUT pretty f'ing close!  My Dr was happy with the number considering it was down 13 lbs from where I was last June (and I'm down a total of 22 lbs since this crazy Dicks vs Chicks thing got instigated!)  He's totally on board with my game plan of losing another 15 - 20 lbs but says that anything under 160 is a-ok with him!

I ran the numbers this morning, so far I'm at 11% body mass gone - that's not bad for 2 1/2 months, huh?  The husband is down 12 lbs which isn't even 10% for him.  I'm pretty sure the chicks have this one, but I'm not counting any eggs yet - these puppies still gotta hatch!  And by that I mean I still gotta lose more weight and the boys still have some time to kick it into high gear and do something dumb and boy-like, like lose 30 lbs by sneezing and farting at the same time!  Not likely, I know, but I think I read something like that once on the internets, so it's gotta be true, right? :0 )

Now for the weekend.  I've got a 2 miler today and a 6 miler tomorrow.  My treadmill is kind of fixed, but I think it still needs a part replaced.  I'm going to try and do my run tomorrow on it and see how it goes.  I cannot, CANNOT wait to see a 1 and a 6 on that scale.  There will definitely be photos for that one!

This week is going to be great!  It's the week leading up to my birthday weekend - how could it not be great!

T.G.I.M.!

That's right, Thank Gaaaaaaaawd It's Monday!  What a c.r.a.z.y. weekend we had!  Baseball clinics, birthday shopping, birthday party number 1, baseball trophy day, baseball team lunch and then, because we hadn't done enough yet, we had birthday party number 2!  I know, I'm certifiably crazy.  I'm absolutely, 100% convinced of it!

That being said, I'm pretty sure it was all worth it considering how absolutely over-the-moon happy my little dude was this weekend!  He had his friend party at Chuck E Cheese (the depths of hell for parents as we know it) and I'm pretty sure that even if he hadn't gotten a single present would have been thrilled with just that party.  I mean, with a cake like this one, how could he not be ecstatic about his birthday?

It was such a cool cake!  I've found the best cake artist and I love her!  She's never disappointed me yet and has made quite a few cakes for me over the last two years!  Stephanie Tennant at Cakes By Stephanie honestly is a cake genius, check her out the next time you need a cake!

So, with the coolest cake ever, we had to let him have it at the coolest place on earth (see above for my thoughts on the place), Chuck E Cheese.  But seriously, look how cute he was in the windy ticket booth!

I love how the goggles barely fit his face!  AND, I totally sent him in there with a couple of extra buttons undone, hoping that a few tickets would actually get trapped in there since I knew he was going to be too busy holding the goggles in place to actually grab anything.  Yeah, that didn't really work. Luckily, the girl doing it took pity on him and dropped some of the big tickets on the ground for him!  He was thrilled!

So, with my nightmare and his dream-come-true over with, we whirled through the rest of the events of the weekend with family, friends and eating fairly well!  I didn't, for the record, eat anything at CEC EXCEPT for the veggies from the veggie tray.  Oh wait!  I guess I did since I HAD to have a piece of cake!  It's bad luck to not have cake on someone's birthday!

I weighed myself on Saturday morning and was 173.8 (I think that's what it was!)  I did another little happy dance since I was pretty that that same number wouldn't be there come Monday morning!  Aaaaaaand I was right!  I ate really well this weekend, but didn't get my run in yesterday because of everything going on and because my treadmill is still sick so this morning the scale said 175.4 (I think?)  Still down from last Monday by a few points so I'll take it, but definitely not where I wanted to be.

I need my treadmill back!  I hate doing my long runs outside by myself!  However, if it's not fixed after dinner tonight, I guess I'm gonna have to suck it up and just go because I'm not going to miss a run!

Here's a few more cute birthday pics, just for fun!

The birthday King on his throne with all of his bounty!

Definitely one of the favourite gifts from the weekend!  Green is his favourite colour after all!

Later this week, countdown to my doctor induced weigh-in on Friday!  Gotta keep up the momentum!!

Eeeeeeek! My baby's all grows up!

How did that happen?  Where the f did the last 4 years go?  This is a picture of me with my boys 4 years ago when my 'big' boy started JK.

Holy shmolie, how young do I look?  How teeny-tiny is my little man?  He was just starting to walk there and the big guy could still easily sit on my lap and not make me feel like I was going to lose a limb due to blood flow stoppage!

This is a pic of my boys from this morning as they were walking out the door, both heading to their first days at school.  The big man started grade 2...whaaaaaat?   Yup, grade freaking 2 and the little guy started his very first day of JK.  Sniff, sniff.

See what 4 years can do?  It definitely gets you a new paint colour on your front door and perhaps even a few hundred inches on a big boy!  And, just so you can see how much their adorable faces have changed, here's one more from this weekend!

We had such an amazing time this weekend, I have to tell you a little bit about it.  We spent the weekend at Blue Mountain where we explored the mountain (see those little 'gondolas' in the background of the above picture?  Those are the husband's worst nightmare!)  We went down the mountain on these amazing little bobsled-like contraptions that brought horrible images to my brain as we whipped around corners going full speed down the hill on a flimsy metal track with nothing but a little netting to catch us if we happened to become a worst case scenario!  It was fun though - like A LOT of fun!  We went swimming and hiking and had more fun together as a family than we have probably all summer.  All in all, it was the perfect ending to a very busy summer!

It was so nice, that I even relented and let my big boy take a picture of the husband and I.  I probably should have consulted with a mirror before agreeing, but oh well!  Here's what nature does to me!

I stepped on the scale Friday morning before going away and was 176 - which made my heart sing!  I stepped on the scale this morning and it said 177.6.  Most of that is just because I wasn't drinking water this weekend the way that I normally do.  I'm not too worried, I know I'll be down to 175 by the end of this week, perhaps even lower.  The immediate goal is to be 170 by next Friday.  169 would be even better, but not sure if that's realistic.  Fingers crossed...

I think what I'm most pleased with about this weekend (well, aside from the fact that we had such a great time and can't wait to go back!) is the fact that I didn't give in to all of the sweets and treats that I was surrounded by!  I made smart food choices all weekend and we were active the whole time!  It was fun and I didn't feel depressed when I stepped on the scale this morning.  As a matter of fact, those jeans that I'm wearing in the picture from 4 years ago?  Those are the same jeans that I pulled on this morning and am currently comfortably wearing while typing this!  Now that, is a victory!

Later this week?  The husband is creating our meal plan - he's apparently decided that it's time to get his game on too!  Yeeeeeeeesssssssss!

I'm a bad, bad blogger!

Whoops!  It would seem that my weighday Monday has come and gone and I was AWOL from this here space!  Don't think for even one second that I didn't pull my sorry butt out of bed on Monday morning, pee and strip down to what my momma gave me to weigh in, because I sure did!  AND the results were totally positive which is why it's pretty funny that I didn't run right out to my laptop to record them for the world to see!  I blame my lack of blogging on the husband being out of town all. week. long. We'll talk about that in a minute though.

Without further ado, may I please announce to you all that I finally, after 2 years, have broken through the 180 mark!!  I was so happy - I can't even tell you how ecstatic I was to see 178.4 waiting for me when I was done saying my little prayer and then prying my eyes open with toothpicks since I was squeezing them shut so fiercely!

So, once I broke through that horrible barrier that has been haunting me for the last two years, I was finally brave enough to go into the dark, depths of my closet and pull out the jeans I've been using as my goal jeans for almost 2 years now.  Once, about a year ago I was able to squeeze into them, but had to really suck everything in to try and do them up.  When I did, I was pretty sure that once I took them off, I was going to be like the magician's assistant in the box after the sawing the body in half trick!  That wouldn't be scaring for my kids at all, would it?
Anywhoooo, I pulled them on *note, I said pulled, not squished all my pudge into* and did them up with next to no effort at all!  They still don't look how I want them to look - I'm probably a 1/2 size too big for them still, but the real victory for me was first of all the fact that I could easily get them on without looking like a jack-in-the-box having a grand mal seizure and secondly that I could actually breath with them on!

You know what the best part about all of these mini successes are for me?  That they are all motivating me to stay on target and continue working towards my goal.  We are 1/2 way through the dicks vs chicks competition right now which means I still have another 6 weeks to try my very best to get to the 12 week goal I set for myself - 165 lbs.  Normally by this point in my weight loss journey, I would have given up my dedication and have resigned myself to being fat.  Not. this. time.  I'm on a mission, and nothing is gonna get in this girl's way!

So back to the husband being away for the entire week.  It's not fun.  Sometimes he drives me crazy when he's here and makes mess all over the house, but I miss him when he's gone and so do the kids.  I can't wait for him to get back and for the long weekend to start!  We've got BIG plans!  We always say we're going to do something big and exciting for the last long weekend of the summer, but things have always gotten in the way.  Now that we don't have our sweet Molly-dog anymore, we are free to come and go as we please without worrying about her.  This weekend should be tons o' fun!  What are you up to this weekend?

Found this on Pinterest and thought it was perfect for today!

It happened...

I finally made it into the 170's!!  I stepped on the scale yesterday morning to do my mid-week check, closed my eyes really tight and said a silent prayer hoping that it would say 179.something and when I opened them, it said 179.0!  If only I'd known that all you had to do was scrunch your eyes tight and say a little prayer, this would have been done a loooooooooong time ago!

I've been trying to take the running easy this week because my legs have been a tiny bit stiff from the run on Saturday night.   Now that I'm extra motivated to keep the pounds coming off, I don't want to sit on my butt either!  Last night however, I sat.  I spent the entire day cleaning my house yesterday.  I vacuumed, I scrubbed, I wiped, I tidied - I think, based on the 5 hours I spent cleaning that it's safe to say I burned about 500 calories cleaning.  So, that's why my couch won last night.  Today, however, I've got 4 miles on the treadmill because it's gotten super hot outside again.

I'm trying to decide what I should work towards next in terms of running goals.  Another 10 k?  Something more?  I'm not convinced that I have the dedication to do more yet.  I don't know that I want to do another 1/2 especially since crossing that 15 k finish line was extremely satisfying, don't get me wrong, but it was tough.  The question is what, where and when?

Suggestions?  Anyone...ANYONE??

Found this on Pinterest today and thought I'd share.  Well, let's be honest.  I put it here to remind myself that I should be doing these things on a weekly basis!

I loves me a PB!

Nope, not peanut butter (although, I TOTALLY love peanut butter in pretty much anything!)  This time, I loves me a new personal best!!  The 15 k - which I might have mentioned a billion times once or twice over the last few weeks - was this past Saturday.  So, rewind selector just a teeeny tiny bit and you'll discover that never before have I actually done the majority all of the runs suggested in order to train for a run.  Even for the 1/2 I did in 2010!   So, committing to my running schedule for the last 5 1/2 weeks was actually a hugemongous thing for me.  I went into the race on Saturday feeling a bit nervous because I wasn't sure how actually training for a run would affect the end results.  

I think I've mentioned before that I'm a slow, steady runner.  I'm definitely not going to set any world records at any time in my existence, but I will always get the job done.  When my Bestie and I ran the 10 k in May, we finished in 1 hr and 19 minutes (I think.)  As I said on Friday, as long as we finished the full 15 k in under 2 hours, I was gonna be a happy chiquita.  So......we got to the race on Saturday and the Bestie realized we'd forgotten her Garmin (our 10 and 1 God and pace keeper.) At first it was kind of weird not knowing if we were going too fast or when to take our walk breaks, but then it actually became kind of freeing.  We started walking at the 2 km points and then after walking for what felt like about a minute, we just started running again.  It was GRRRRRRRREAT! (Sorry, I couldn't help myself!)

Finally at the 10 k point, we found someone who was wearing a Garmin who very kindly told us that we'd just finished the 10 k in less than an hour and 15 minutes!  Whaaaaaaaaat?  We shaved at least 4 minutes off of our last time!  Amaze-balls!  

NOW, I have to come clean and let you know that at the 12 k point I was starting to crap out.  My legs were getting tired and my knees were starting to feel it to.  We started walking more but we still ran more than we walked.  Our final time for the full 15 k was I believe 1:55!!  We came in 5 minutes UNDER the 2 hr mark!  

I know, I know, it's not amazing by any stretch of the imagination but we almost totally stuck to the walk/run rule throughout the entire race AND we finished strong!  I'm really happy with the results and next year (yup! there will be a next time!) I might even dress up with my Bestie (but I'll still wear my Run Swiftly underneath it all - but I've got more to say about that later!)

For now though...An after shot (so pretty in my post-race glory, aren't I?)

ps, the scale said 180.9 this morning.  Sooooooooo close I can taste it!  Next week is gonna be good, hold on to your hats!

aaaaaaaand I'm back!

Annnnnnnd, I need a vacation from my vacation!  Thankfully that little foray into the woods happens but once a year and I now have an entire year to recover and prepare myself for our cottage 'vacation' again next year!

Some good definitely came from this trip away though.  The first is that I for the most part stayed on track and didn't eat like crap as I normally would.  I actually don't even think I had one delicious beverage the entire time we were there - maybe I should have!  There's also a pretty huge plus to having to literally walk up a hill to get to the bathroom - it means calories are burning on a regular basis!  It does however mean that my water intake was down over the week (for which I blame my minor weight gain today.)

Oh! speaking of which, I weighed in at 183.6 today which is up .2 from where I was last Monday!  Yup, that's right, there was a scale on premiss for our little trip to the woods thanks to the head Richard himself, my brother!  It actually helped to keep me on track which was good.  At one point after a run, I weighed myself at 181.6 which was why I was so disappointed this morning when that number showed up.  However, I can get back there an am aiming to be below 180 next Monday.

I ran outside a lot this past week and it was glorious!  I love running at the cottage.  The shade of the trees, the breeze off of the lake...it's amazing and really invigorating.  I wish I could do that every week!  Now that the cooler weather is here, I think I'm going to aim to hit the lakefront trail here once a week after dropping the boys off at school.  There's a great trail down there - not quite as pretty as the one at the cottage, but there's some pretty nice little spots and a couple of decent hills to keep me going strong!

I've got my big 15 k on Saturday.  I hope that this run is way better than my most horrible run, jog, exasperating walk that happened last weekend!  I tried to do 8.5 mi on a treadmill in the gym while at the cottage and it really wasn't a good idea.  I'm really not sure why, but every time I try to run on a treadmill other than my own, it really doesn't work out so well.  I can never get the pace right, I feel super hot because I don't have my tiny built in fan blowing cold air on my belly button (one of these days I'm seriously just going to tape that thing in place so it will actually blow on my face!)  Generally, it's a really sad display and this time was no different.
I assumed going into manual mode would  allow me to run as far/long as I wanted.  I really shouldn't ever ass-u-me.  After 30 minutes of already the worst run ever, it went into cool down mode.  When I tried to up the time, it just kept ramping down.  So then I got mad, stopped it and started all over again.  I hopped off for a minute to get a paper towel to wipe my sweat drenched face with and the thing shut off again.  By this time, I was furious and frustrated so I started walking more and more and feeling worse about the run.  I did however, get the distance in, but there wasn't a whole lotta running happening, that's for sure.  After that, I decided I wasn't running on that machine again and did the rest of my runs outside all week - even in the rain one day!

So, this week it's lots of little runs, lots of water and fingers crossed that we get down below the 180 that's been plaguing me for the last year!  I'M GONNA DO IT!

This elevator is going down!

A week - one whole entire week, 7 full days has passed since I last posted on here.  It's been a busy, but mostly pretty enjoyable 7 days though so I can't really complain.  And you wanna know the other reason why I can't complain?  Well, that, my friends would be because this morning when I stepped on the scale, it said 186.1!  Not quite the 5 lbs I was hoping for, but still 3.4 (I think) from last week and that's not bad at all considering my tiny little losses for the last few weeks.  Look out fingers and toes, you just won yourself a mani/pedi date!

The other reason why this makes me happy?  We went camping this weekend with Charlie and her family.  A little back-story here, in a previous life, I was called the Fairmont Princess.  I am not so much about being dirty and grungy and fending for myself for longer than a couple of days.  I have to tell you though, sitting around the campfire at the end of the day with good company and a few drinks was, well, a little bit of heaven!  I tried to be really good about the number of beers I had over the course of the weekend, but I also didn't restrict myself.  If I wanted a drink, I had one.  That being said, I was also fairly conscious of the things I was eating throughout the day too.

Probably the biggest factor in my loss last week though was sticking to my running schedule and making sure that I got that big run in BEFORE my weigh-in this morning.  When we got home yesterday afternoon, I have to admit, running was the last thing I wanted to do.  Quite honestly, I probably would have been just as happy to snuggle up on the couch with my little dudes and have a power nap.  I didn't give in though and I got my 7.5 mi done in 83 minutes.  Not too shabby considering that's the furthest I've run since my 1/2 marathon training days.

I'm really hoping that I can keep up this momentum and have another 3/4 lb week so that I can be within an arms reach of the 170's.  To keep on track with my 165 goal, I need to be at least 175 by the end of August, but preferably lower.  I'm really going to try and get my butt into the gym this week on top of my running schedule.  Next week we're at the cottage which has both it's pros and cons.  We will be there with my brother and SIL which means I'll have a running/workout buddy.  The bad news is that the cottage and yummy food go hand in hand.  I'll have to be prepared for that and find ways to work around those hurdles so that I don't gain while I'm away.

So, running, being hyper critical of what goes in my mouth - and when, and drinking a TON of water are all part of my game plan this week.  What's yours?

The weight is over...

Ha!  See that funny little play on words I used there?  Yup, that's right, I am *that* girl!  Besides, a little play on words is what a girl needs when the scale didn't say what she wanted it to say!  I contemplated not posting today, but since I started this thing to keep me honest and on track, I really couldn't do that, now could I?  The scale this morning said 189.5 - up only a few points from last week, but not down like it said on Friday when I timidly stepped on to check in!

It's 100% my fault - well, duh! of course it's my fault!  What I mean is, I was supposed to go for my big run yesterday afternoon (7 miles) and I procrastinated the afternoon away until I didn't have enough time to do it until after supper.  Of course, after supper I sat down on the couch while the boys were playing and well, it was game over.  So, today, while the boys are at camp again, I WILL be doing my 7 miles before I get to do anything else!

This week, I've decided to add food journaling to my routine.  I'm not sure if I'll do the traditional, write everything down in a little book, sign up for an app on my phone OR photo journal.  Each has their pros and cons.  Maybe I should do all 3 for a few days and see which works best for me.  I've done the book before - but it's just me writing stuff down and doesn't necessarily have the impact of a visual tracking device like an app on my phone.  If I take pictures, I'm probably going to spend more time making it look pretty AND making sure that it's healthy enough that I can actually have photographic proof of it!

I think also, that I am going to give myself a mini incentive for next week.  I really and I mean REALLY need a pedicure.  Need it like if I took a picture of my dry, flakey feet right now, you'd probably cover your eyes and run screaming from your computer screen.  They are that bad.  Soooooo, If I lose at least 2 lbs this week (like I said, I really need it!) I'm going to book a mani pedi appointment for next week and pamper myself a little bit!

I really need to dig deep and start working harder this week.  If my SIL and I are going to win our little competition, I have to be into the 160's by the beginning of Sept.  That's 6 weeks away and means I have to have a couple of weeks of at least 5 lbs in order to make this work.  I can do it, but I've got to work my ass off - literally, in order to get there.

So, here's what's on tap for this week:
Monday - 7 mile run, some core and arm work
Tuesday - 4 mile run, legs/butt and core work
Wednesday - 2 mile run, core, arm and leg work on the machines
Thursday - 4 mile run
Friday - 3.5 mile run and camping fun!
Saturday - mooooooore camping fun!
Sunday - 7.5 miles

If I can get all of these runs in AND really take control of my eating, this should be a really good week!

Bring it week, BRING IT!

I'm still standing...barely!

Well, I did it.  I took a big breath (well, then immediately let it out because I didn't want to add anything extra to the number I was about to see) and then gingerly stepped on the platform, one badly painted pink toenail'd foot after another (mental note, next week, a pedicure is definitely in order!)  Then I waited.  I waited long enough to hope that the number would be something totally different than what I thought it was going to be.  Just long enough for a miracle to happen, but not long enough that the number would disappear from the little display screen.  Then I looked down.
Yikes!  What I saw there was not a good revelation, but it was a necessary one!  For the last 3 years I've been hovering between 185 - 190.  For some reason, I haven't been able to break below the 180 mark.  In fact, the last time I was below 180 was 4 years ago, just before my youngest turned 1 when I was 162 - 7 lbs away from what I weighed when I got married.  This morning, I broke the 180 mark, but not in the direction I was hoping.  This morning, the scale told me that I weighed 193.1 lbs.
I feel like the addict whose just hit rock bottom.
Somehow, those numbers this morning hit it home for me that unless I really do something about this now, I'm going to be headed down the path that my mom was on and I can't go there.  My mom passed away almost 8 years ago from an aggressive cancer that she bravely fought for more than 2 years.  I can't help but feel that it was her unhealthy lifestyle and her choice to avoid things like physical activity and making healthy food choices that made her physically unprepared for the fight of her life.  I want to see my boys grow up and get married.  I don't want my kids to be left without their mom before they turn 30.  I want to know my grandkids. 
For that to happen, I have to start making real changes.  Not just talking about it and making false promises to myself, but actually acting on it.  Last week I made some good headway on that.  Getting back on the treadmill and starting to follow the schedule again was an important step in the right direction.  This morning, I am sitting down with my calendar to schedule all of our meals for the week (I know, I know, I said it was going to happen yesterday, but the scheduled run seemed a tiny bit more important!)  Before the end of this week, I am purchasing a 3 month gym pass for the gym that my friend goes to.  I'm going to make her be my gym buddy for the next 3 months, 3 times per week.  With my run schedule only going until the middle of August right now, this will be important to keep me moving!
Next Monday morning when I step on the scale, I'm hoping only that it be down and that the fat % is less.  I'll actually record all of the numbers next week and put those here too.  Gotta keep it real peeps!

Today's goals = meal plan and run 3 miles (outside if it's not too hot!)

It's just a numbers game

Tomorrow morning I'm going to do something worse than being thrown into an outdoor pool in the middle of November in any city in Canada!  Tomorrow morning, when I wake up, I'm going to step on the scale.  The question in my head right now is will it be better or worse than what I'm imagining?  I'm praying hoping for the best, but expecting fearing the worst.
I think however, that I've finally reached a place where I'm not OK with ignoring this little weight game that I've been playing for the last couple of years.  Hence, writing about it here.  I wouldn't be taking the extreme measure of writing about my struggles and accomplishments for anyone in the cyber world to read if it was all wonderful, right?  I feel like something is different though, like I'm actually prepared to make the necessary changes this time because I don't want to be the F word anymore.
On a totally positive note, I did something that I'm super proud of today!  Sundays are my long run days, and I knew that today was going to be a challenge.  It was 5.5 miles, which is the furthest I've run since May when I did my last 10 k.  How you might ask, does someone go from training for a 10 k to just not doing anything for 2 months?  Well, largely because it's so much easier to succumb to the hypnotic ways of my couch after the kids are in bed than it is to get my butt out the door or down to my dank dungeon of torture (not to be confused with the red room of pain, that's a totally different story, and really not the same...at all!)
Getting back to today, I stood eye to eye with my schedule this morning and I stared at that 5.5 miles typed there for the whole world to see.  As I stood there like a crazy woman, staring at this harmless piece of paper hanging on my fridge, I made a decision that I was better than 5.5 miles.  That if I wanted to, I could run 7 miles today and that 5.5 miles was nothing!  A drop in the bucket really!  So before I actually allowed myself to acknowledge that I was in fact a bold-faced liar, I laced up my NB's and headed down the stairs.  And you know what?  I kicked that 5.5. right square in the kisser, and felt great when I was done!  I started taking walk breaks after I hit 2.5 miles, which is totally fine with me.  I'm totally cool with the 10 and 1 rule, I just like to get some distance behind me before I take the first walk break.
So, tomorrow morning think of me as I stand on my scale, in my bathroom afraid to look down at my feet.  That reminds me, I should probably paint my toes so it doesn't look quite so bad!

Until tomorrow...